What do you expect from your relationship?
November 17, 2008 at 8:15 pm | In Emotional honesty | 2 CommentsTags: authentic living, Conflict, relational health, The Power of Now
I’ve been listening to an audio version of Eckhart Tolle’s book, The Power of Now, and recently heard a familiar idea posed in a brand new way.
Tolle writes about the impossible expectation that many of us have that when we find the “right” lover, spouse, or friend, we’re going to experience a transcendently joyful relationship. Quite a few of us seem to believe that a relationship is going to make us happier. Tolle points out, however, that relationships are meant to teach us, not necessarily bring us bliss. Certainly, relationships can bring us love and deep fulfillment, but the discomfort or heartbreak we also can feel is designed to help us learn and express who we are and also discover more about the other person.
I agree with this concept – how about you? What have you learned through a recent relational conflict?
Imagine how our families and communities would be transformed if each of us could embrace the opportunity in conflict . . . if we didn’t avoid it or get explosive about it but were committed to exploring it together and better understanding each other’s needs. What incredible light and truth would fill our lives and our world.
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I agree. I believe we are here to learn. To learn about ourselves and to grow. And to learn about others. It is hard but the rewards are great.
Comment by Tricia — November 17, 2008 #
The truth that I must practice every time I run into relational conflict is to ask the other person to clarify her meaning. When I make assumptions, the consequences can be really painful.
Comment by Ellen Antill — November 17, 2008 #